Late, Lost and Unprepared: A Parent's Guide to Helping Children with Executive Functioning

Does your child have difficulty meeting deadlines, staying organised, or keeping track of important information? Do they tend to forget details? Are they prone to emotional meltdowns? This book will become your go-to, all-inclusive guide to helping children manage issues with these executive functions.

Late, Lost, and Unprepared is packed with encouragement, strategies, overviews, case studies, tips, and more, explained in accessible, everyday language. In this updated and expanded edition of the highly regarded book for parents, you will find valuable new insights, fresh examples, and an all-new chapter on emotional regulation. Featuring down-to-earth examples and a flexible framework that allows you to think on your feet, the strategies within this book can be adapted to any child or situation.

In addition to providing approaches for helping your child to manage demands in the short run, this book offers strategies for building independent skills for long-term self-management. Late, Lost, and Unprepared gives parents the support they need to help their child become productive and independent – today and in the future.

This is a must-have book for parents and those working with children from primary school through high school who struggle with:

• Impulse Control (taking turns, interrupting others, running off)
• Cognitive Flexibility (adapting to new situations, transitions, handling frustrations)
• Initiation (starting homework, chores, and major projects)
• Working Memory (following directions, note-taking, reading and retaining info)
• Planning & Organising (completing and turning in homework, juggling schedules)
• Self-monitoring (making careless errors, staying on topic, getting into trouble but not understanding why)

Written by clinical psychologists, this book emphasises the need to help the child to manage demands in the short run and build independent skills for long-term self-management. Full of encouragement and practical strategies. Summaries, case studies, tips, and definitions make it easy to grasp concepts quickly and get started.

Part I, What You Need to Know, covers: what executive functions are and how weaknesses in these skills affect development; the impact of weak executive function on children’s emotional lives and their families; how professionals assess executive function problems; and associated conditions (AD/HD--children with an AD/HD diagnosis always have executive skills issues--learning disabilities, autism spectrum disorders, Tourette syndrome, etc.).

Part II, What You Can Do About It: covers how to change behaviour and set reasonable expectations, and offers specific intervention strategies for children of different ages, varying needs, and profiles.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments

Part I: What You Need to Know

1. Introduction
• Why Another Book?
• Who Are We?
• The Plan for This Book
2. What Is Executive Functioning?
• A Formal Definition of Executive Functioning
• Understanding Executive Functions by Looking at Life without Them
• A List of Executive Functions
• How This Book Is Organized
• Final Thoughts
3. Development of the Executive Functions
• Why Is My Child Having Problems with Executive Skill Development?
• I.Q. and Executive Functioning
• Typical Development
• How Do I Know If My Child’s Executive Skills Are Developing Normally?
4. The Child’s Experience of Executive Weaknesses
• Daily Life
• Emotions
5. Impact on the Family
• Impact on Parents
• Impact on Siblings
• Impact on Couples
• Special Situations
• Staying Healthy
6. Assessment: Figuring Out What’s Needed
• The Purpose of Assessment
• Evaluating the Role of Expectations
• The Evaluation Process
• Who Does Testing and What Do They Test?
• Where Should You Seek an Assessment?
• How to Be an Educated Consumer
• Once the Assessment Is Done
• Now What?
• A Note about Executive Functioning and School Plans
7. ADHD, Learning Disabilities, and Other Conditions Associated with Executive Functioning Challenges
• Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)
• Learning Disabilities (L.D.)
• Autism Spectrum Disorders (A.S.D.)
• Other Conditions Often Associated with Executive Function Weaknesses
• Wrap-Up

Part II: What You Can Do about It

8. How to Help: An Overview
• The Two-Pronged Approach
• Designing Interventions
• Creativity at Work
9. Behavior Change in a Nutshell
• Use Real Life to Teach
• Take a Teaching versus a Punishing Approach
• Collaborate with Your Child
• Focus on the Desired Outcome
• Raise the Stakes
• Reward Even Small Steps in the Right Direction
• Use “Tried and True” Behavior Modification Techniques
• Trust Your Child’s Own Developmental Urges
• When Should You Allow Your Child to Experience Natural Consequences for Behavior?
• Change Does Not Occur in a Smooth or Steady Uphill Manner
10. If at First You Don’t Succeed, Try a Few More Times Then … Change Your Expectations!
• Don’t Try to Keep Up with the Joneses
• The Limbo Game of Setting Expectations
• If You Need to Change Expectations
• Your Child’s Expectations
• Your Partner’s Expectations
• Fading Support
11. Helping Children Control Impulses
• Strategies to Help a Child Manage Verbal Impulsiveness (Talking Excessively, Interrupting Others, etc.)
• Strategies to Help a Child Manage Physical Impulsiveness (Grabbing Things, Pushing and Shoving Others, Hitting, etc.)
• Strategies to Help a Child Stop Irritating Behavior
• Strategies to Help a Child Control Running Off in Stores or Other Settings
• Strategies to Help a Child Manage Homework Problems
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
12. Helping Children Shift Gears
• Strategies to Help Children Manage Transitions
• Strategies to Help a Child Adapt to New Situations or Environments
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Becomes Upset When Peers Break the Rules or Behave in Unexpected Ways
• Strategies to Help Reduce a Child’s Frustration When Their First Attempt to Solve a Problem
• Isn’t Successful
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
13. Helping Children Get Started on Homework and Other Tasks
• Strategies to Help Your Child Get Started with Homework
• Strategies to Help Your Child Complete Chores and Other Routine Activities
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Puts Off Major Projects
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
14. Helping Children with Working Memory Challenges
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Has Trouble Following Directions
• Strategies to Help a Child with Written Expression and Other Complex, Multistep Tasks
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Interrupts Others So They Won’t Forget What They Want to Say
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Needs to Reread or Relearn Information
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Has Trouble Taking Notes in Class
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
15. Helping Children to Plan and Organize
• Strategies to Help a Child Organize and Track Multiple Tasks over Time
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Underestimates the Effort Involved in a Project
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Does Homework But Doesn’t Turn It In
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Struggles When Prioritizing Bits of Information
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Arrives at Events Unprepared
• Strategies to Help a Child Organize Their Materials and Their Space (Locker, Desk, Bedroom)
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
16. Helping Children Monitor Their Behavior
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Gets Upset with the Outcome in a Situation but Lacks a Realistic, Systematic Approach to Making Things Go Better
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Doesn’t Notice When They Have Gone Off on a Tangent
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Doesn’t Notice “Careless” Errors
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Doesn’t Adjust Behavior Based on Feedback
• Strategies to Help a Child Notice When Peers Lose Interest in the Topic of Conversation
• Strategies to Help a Child Who Is Genuinely Surprised When They Get in Trouble for Misbehavior (“What Did I Do?”)
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
17. Special Topic: Helping Children with Emotional Regulation
• Strategies to Help Children and Teens Build Foundation Skills for Self-Regulation
• Strategies to Help Children and Teens Who Need a Little Extra Support to Manage Their Feelings
• Strategies to Help Children and Teens Who Need a Lot More Support to Manage Their Feelings and to Recover Once They Lose Control
• Case Study: Putting It All Together
• Transitioning from Short-Term to Long-Term Goals
• Educate Others and Advocate for Your Child
• Final Thoughts
18. Concluding Thoughts
• The Zen of Intervention Planning
• The “No Victims” Approach
• Building a Life
• Who Can Help?
• A Field in Progress

Appendix

Bibliography

Index